Series: Watch a Poem Grow: Make a Noise

UPDATED: APRIL 30, 2017

A family of trees fall. Slugs
We leave. Snails, we keep. Watch
How shells repel the black stream.
See how feelers smell and retract,
Snap and grow. Regrow. Snap.

The PROCESS:

This poem was based on lyrics from MGMT's Kids. [See: Who is MGMT -- Watch Video ]

For days, the lyric segment, "take only what you need" kept haunting me. Seriously, it would repeat for hours, finally be sent packing by a major distraction, and return during any boring/routine activity. I did not like the message, therefore, Kill the messenger.

At a previously-scheduled retreat, during the inevitable collage-making activity, I cut thru a Forbes magazine & tried to pin down lyrical meaning.

When I returned, my son told me what he remembered of lyrics's chorus: Enjoy yourself// Take only what you need from him// A family of trees fallin// To be haunted.

OK, well that changes things. To be one of the title's "kids" is to enjoy yourself, and take only what you need might apply to a journey, as in when packing take only what you need -- a liberating message, no?

But... the mood of video -- where rotting monsters follow a crying toddler who walks away from an inattentive mother & heads to the forest -- that didn't connect.

So, I printed out true lyrics. It's really. CONTROL YOURSELF // Take only what you need from IT. // A family of trees wantin' // To be haunted.

Yeah. It was Poetry Time.

I did word analysis, breaking down lyrics (both real and misheard) into word groups: verbs, pronouns, nouns. Separately, I matched/generated sound alike words & pulled together full rhymes and slant rhymes, which are internal rhymes, which I use extensively.

Then, time to write. I started a haiku, which is three lines: 5, then 7, then 5 words each. This helped me simmer poem down to core. Haiku has two ideas or images; includes seasonal reference; and uses the "knife" -- a word that slices parts of poem into two images or ideas, with the "knife" word as bridge uniting the two components.

I like to brainstorm a Haiku, because, ha ha, it cuts poem to its core. Forces a setting or mood because of the need for seasonal reference. Forces turning points. Encourages concrete word usage and economic use of symbols.

From my haiku skeleton, I played around with words & symbols & double entendre, added what felt left out and voila, my draft of Make a noise.

So, I'll put it away for a months or so, and then start the long, long editing process.